Bits o’ sunshine and sprinkles

CONGRATULATIONS!! You are at school.
SYABASI!! Kerena anda hadir ke sekolah.

These are the bold lavender letters that somewhat forcefully greet me every morning when I enter my school’s courtyard. Judging by my students’ bleary-eyed expressions as they slowly mill about the courtyard in an amoeba-like fashion, I suspect they don’t share the sign’s imperative enthusiasm.

My students are stirred into partial wakefulness when the first bell rings alerting them to Monday assembly in the Dewan, the school hall. The teachers sit in rows on the stage facing the student body. My 800-some Malay students, ages 13-18, assemble; the boys, in their crisp white shirts and khaki ties and pants, line up in the front rows, while the girls, clad in their white tudongs (the headscarf worn by Muslim women), starched white baju kurung tops and long sky blue skirts, line up in the back rows. Sprinkled amongst them are students in light green and dark red—the colored coded librarian workers and prefects.

A prefect sporting the black songkok, (a traditional male hat worn in Malaysia—oval-shaped and brimless) walks to the podium and leads some sung Qur’anic verses for the opening prayer. It’s lilting and quite beautiful.

Following this, the students sing a completely deadpan rendition of the state and national anthem. (It is 7 in the morning after all). Although they appear to be singing, I’m convinced some of my students are simultaneously sleeping and standing up. By the time we get to the school anthem, I have to stifle my chuckles. Despite the obnoxiously peppy tune—in the vein of Hamtaro or some other children’s show intro-song (think happy animal creatures and rolling hills with cotton candy trees and you’ll get the type of song I’m talking about)—bouncing forth over the loudspeakers, my students sound (and look) like they are singing a dirge. The scene really is quite comedic.

Announcements and such follow. Teachers and administrative folks give long-winded speeches; some I suspect are berating the students. Like crocodiles just before submerging in water I can literally see my student’s eyes glaze over.

I muse what would happen if I whipped out the lavender sign and pranced about the stage waving it and shouting “Wake up! Wake up! You must be congratulated! You are at school!” Would that crack a smile or two? I bet that if I coupled the prancing with some gangnam style moves, it would.

I may have just made my students sounds like zombie-like specters that straggle in for morning assembly. However, meet them at any other time of day and this description couldn’t be farther from the truth. Taken out of morning assembly blob-think-mode, my students truly are sparkling bundles of energy and joy. Teaching has certainly been a roller-coaster of a challenge these past couple of months (I’m teaching 22 classes a week of about 30 students each—meaning I interact with at least 600 students a week) and certain rowdy classes/uncooperative students have made the thought of defenestration as a legitimate form of classroom management fleetingly cross my mind. However, despite all this, so many of my students bring such complete sunshine to my day, it makes everything worth it.

My little bits of sunshine.

• There are the adorably tiny form 1 girls (equivalent to our 7^th/8^th graders) who come up to me smiling shyly every couple of weeks to give me a new present. I now have a small, ever-expanding collection of buttons, cute bracelets and small teddy bear key chains.

• There is the student who ever since I beat-boxed at my weekly morning assembly English talk, will periodically beat-box at me during class. Either that, or he’ll do the wave at me. Obviously both excellent portrayals of his English-language acquisition.

• There is the group of form 2 girls who tap my shoulder and squeal “Teacha! You so beautiful today!” before running away in a fit of giggles. The compliments on my beauty increase exponentially on the days I am not wearing a Western outfit, but instead the brightly colored traditional Malay dress, the baju kurung.

• There is the student who whenever I log onto my Teacher face book account accosts me with questions about food, cooking techniques, American food and well, world cuisine in general. Do like to eat turkey on Thanksgiving? What do avocados taste like? What’s guacamole? What is the meaning of “sauté?” Have you tried crème brûlée? Do you like cheese? What’s your favorite type of pasta? Do you really really like mashed potatoes? The girl is clearly an avid watcher of the food network and most of our conversations leave me salivating for some sort of dish or food-item that cannot be obtained in Malaysia.

• There is the group of boys who practically speak no English, but whenever I walk by their classroom stick their hands out to wave  and obnoxiously stage-whisper “He-lo He-lo teacha!” at me. I’m sure this really pleases their teacher.

• There’s the form 5 boy who I’ve discovered is an ardent break dancer. When we did letter writing in class he described how he was a b-boy and then proceeded to make an extensive list of the various freezes he was capable of. He also is a perfectionist and one of the few people who asks me loads of questions in class. Ahhh, how a teacher loves a student who is enthusiastic and dares to ask questions!

• There are the two students who are my official k-pop advisors. They have filled numerous pages of my mini notebook with their scrawled suggestions of new K-pop groups and hit-songs that I should most definitely be listening to.

• Then there are my form 5 girls who for our talent show choreographed and sang Justin Beiber’s “Baby.” One of them, wearing leather jacket, a trucker hat over her tudong and Air Jordans rapped the Ludacris part of the song. Priceless.

• And finally, there is the student who every time he sees me waves furiously and gives me the biggest grin ever and an asian peace sign to boot. (The one time I visited the afternoon Tuesday market near my school, I nearly had a heart attack when he and a bunch of students literally popped up from behind one of the fruit stalls shouting “Teacha! Teacha!” *franticwave-asianpeacesign-giganticgrin*) This kid and his million-dollar grin single-handedly makes my day every time.

Joyful sprinkles. The incorrect greeting phenomenon.

Some other joyful sprinkles in my day—My students, while often still too shy to have an actual English conversation with me, have latched on to various expressions as greeting:

In my first weeks, I made a point of having my students respond to my “How are you?” with something other than a robotic “I-am-fine-teecha.” Now in response to my question, I have managed to get choruses of “I AM FANTASTIC!” Some students no longer even bother saying “Hello teacha”. Seeing me approach they’ve decided the best way to greet me is to simply cry “Fantastic! Fanstastic!”

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On April 1^st, I played an April Fools Joke on some of my students, pretending that they had a major English exam that period. They were far from thrilled and some, when I asked if they had studied for it, hastily nodded yes! (Liars! Ha.) After revealing that their English teacher had duped them, I taught them expressions like “Just kidding!” “Yooooouuu’ve been punked!” and “You’re just pulling my leg!” For at least a month after, a group of boys who generally can’t string together a whole English sentence greeted me daily (in passing or when hanging from stairwells) with impish grins: “JUST KIDDING!”

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After my assembly English talk about learning French, a group of students have taken it upon themselves to happily cry “BONJOO TEACHA!” every time they see me. One girl even asked me to teach her french. (Ha, so much for teaching them English.)

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During a series of lessons where students performed skits, I had them show their appreciation for each other by applauding and shouting “Bravo!” I now have a couple of students who vivaciously exclaim “Bravo!” at all the incorrect times, including when they pass me in the hallway.

It’s a bit like the lavender sign I suppose: “Bravo!! You’re walking in a hallway.”

But for me, something else resonates. The underlying message is clear:

Congratulations!! You are at school.

As an English teacher.

In Malaysia.

Woah. Yes, there is a lot to celebrate about.